No one can have it all. Knowing this, however, doesn’t seem to prevent me from trying to have it all every now and then. So sometimes I write to remind myself of truths that I easily forget, like this one about trade-offs:

He who is not indifferent to fame and pleasure, as well as to the love of riches that exists because of them and increases them, cannot cut off occasions for anger. And he who does not cut these off cannot attain perfect love.

Maximos the Confessor, First Century on Love, #75

Not many people will strive for one thing—like “perfect love” or an Olympic gold medal—at the expense of all others. If they do, it’s because that one thing is worth it to them. Most of us will pursue some sort of balance, maintaining what we deem to be the best prioritized tension between everything we want. This calculus of priority is something we all need to work out for ourselves, but it is a zero-sum game.

If you’re as prone as I am to forget this reality, it would do you good to consider questions about your priorities that help you rebalance or refocus: What do you want most? About what do you care most?